He could have left everything to Shuuji, but he wanted to be by his side, even for a little while.
Koutarou had been trying not to get in the way of his work, so even when they were in the same room lately, they’d hardly spoken with each other.
They made dinner together, ate it still together, and for the first time in a while, they got to spend slow, easy time with each other.
It was still a bit early to go to bed, so they moved to the living room and had some coffee.
“Maybe I’ll come shopping tomorrow too.”
“You have become a bit of a shut-in.
Running out of ideas?”
“Yeah, something like that,” Shuuji smiled, confirming Koutarou’s suspicions.
If all he did was output, his pool of ideas would end up drained.
Koutarou decided to talk about what had happened to him that day, maybe it would be one piece of input, at least.
“Speaking of, at the supermarket earlier…”
He told Shuuji all about the man who’d collapsed, and how he’d done emergency first-aid until the ambulance arrived.
“You did all that?” When the story was over, Shuuji didn’t hide his surprise.
“I didn’t have any real life experience, but I managed.”
He didn’t necessarily want to boast, but he just wanted to report that there were things he could do, even as he was now.
But Shuuji’s face was pale.
“Jeez, is that alright?” Shuuji muttered, like he was talking to himself.
“What if someone had noticed you, Koutarou…”
“I’m not that famous.” Koutarou flashed a grin to say Shuuji was worrying too much.
“Someone in the medical field might know you.”
“It was only the EMTs who saw me,” Koutarou said, trying to reassure him that it was okay.
They had asked him if he would accompany the man to the hospital, but he didn’t really know the man, and the EMTs were there, and besides, Koutarou only had theoretical knowledge, he wasn’t really needed, so he’d refused.
So the only ones Koutarou had actually spoken with there had been the EMTs.
But, the smile didn’t come back to Shuuji’s face.
He still looked tense.
“Nobody was really looking at people’s faces that well anyway.
Everyone was focused on the man who collapsed.”
“If you were a normal person, maybe, but you’re different, Koutarou.
You should be a little more self-aware, your looks catch people’s eyes.”
“Do they?” Koutarou tilted his head, not understanding.
“With a face that good-looking, and you’re tall, and you carry yourself well, anybody would notice you.
If you had any clothing sense, you’d look like a model.”
“Well, because it doesn’t matter what I wear, right,” Koutarou said, looking down at himself.
He didn’t have any hang ups about clothes, so he just kept wearing the same stuff for years, until they got damaged or hard to keep clean.
“To be honest, I’ve always thought it was kind of a waste.
You would look so amazing.”
“Isn’t it better if I don’t stand out?”
“Which is why I haven’t said anything, have I,” Shuuji said, like it really was such a shame.
It seemed that they were going to drop the matter without having to change his wardrobe, and Koutarou sighed to himself in relief.
If Shuuji said he wanted it no matter what, he’d be happy to dress however Shuuji liked, but if he didn’t have to, he’d never go that far on his own.
He wasn’t picky about what he wore, but neither did he want to press for change himself.
Shuuji seemed to still be uneasy, and his voice was clouded over.
“Well then maybe I should wear glasses when I go outside,” Koutarou said, and made circles with his thumb and forefinger of each hand, putting them over each eye in place of glasses.
His eyesight wasn’t bad, so he’d never worn glasses before, and he’d only even worn sunglasses that one time, when he’d made the decision to leave Shuuji.
Glasses were the only disguise he could think of, but if that would put Shuuji at ease, he’d put on anything.
“You’d look good in any kind of glasses, Koutarou,” Shuuji finally smiled, but even then it was fleeting.
As long as he was a clone, he wouldn’t be able to entirely erase Shuuji’s anxiety, and he knew it.
It was just something he wasn’t going to be able to achieve.
Koutarou took the coffee cup from Shuuji’s hand, and set it on the table.
Then he gently wrapped his arms around Shuuji, who responded by looking at him questioningly.
“You’re not working any more today, right?” Koutarou asked back, and Shuuji silently nodded, his face going a little red.
“Let’s get to bed then,” Koutarou said, and then got up and put his hands behind Shuuji’s hips and knees, quietly picking him up.
“Oi, Koutarou,” Shuuji said, flustered.
It was the first time in the long years that they’d been going out that Koutarou had done anything like this.
When research had been his entire life, he’d been indifferent to his physical health, and he hadn’t had much arm strength, but now he was extremely toned.
He’d become more active, and had more opportunities for physical work.
He’d gotten so he could pick up Shuuji’s delicate frame, at least.
Even so, Shuuji must have been agitated, or worried maybe, because he clung to Koutarou’s neck.
He was pretty cute like that, and a smile naturally came to the corners of Koutarou’s mouth.
He carefully carried Shuuji into the bedroom and quietly laid him on the bed, and then started to get up again.
But Shuuji’s arms held him in place.
Shuuji clung to him, and his words cut themselves off.
Shuuji’s arms were trembling slightly.
Living with a clone, someone whose very existence was uncertain, was making Shuuji uneasy.
He was clearly trying to shake it off, but that uncontrollable anxiety still showed in expression.
Koutarou gently put his mouth on Shuuji’s lips.
He knew he couldn’t wipe away Shuuji’s anxiety just by tying their bodies together, but he could certainly make sure that Shuuji knew he was real, that he existed.
After Shuuji’s trembling had quieted down, Koutarou took the next step and removed all the clothes that were standing between him and Shuuji’s body.
Shuuji let it all happen to him without saying anything, but when Koutarou put his hands on the final piece, his underpants, he spoke up.
“I’m the only one who’s going to be naked here?” Shuuji protested in a voice that was a bit sullen, perhaps because he was trying to cover up embarrassment.
I got in a rush.”
“Now you’re in a rush?” Shuuji smiled, obviously amused.
That was the smile Koutarou liked.
He’d liked Shuuji’s smile since way back.
He brought his face close again, like he was going to breathe in that smile, and they kissed.
After that, Koutarou started to remove his own clothes.
Soon enough, he was completely naked, and then he took off Shuuji’s final remaining piece of clothing.
This time, Shuuji didn’t say anything.
Now that neither of them was wearing a single stitch of clothing, they at last turned to each other.
“Seems like you still haven’t gotten that weight back, huh,” Koutarou said, reaching his hand out to Shuuji’s bare chest.
“Yeah…” Shuuji let out a little sigh at the feel of Koutarou’s hand.
“I can see your bones like this.” There was a whiff of self-censure in Koutarou’s voice.
Shuuji had been thin to begin with, but with the shock of Koutarou’s accident, Shuuji had become excessively skinny.
After Koutarou returned as the clone, they’d eaten together, and Koutarou had made sure to feed him things with actual nutritional value, but his body weight hadn’t quite returned to baseline.
It was all Koutarou’s fault.
“I’ve always had trouble gaining weight anyway.” Shuuji told him not to worry, and then flashed a suggestive smile.
“Or maybe you don’t want to hold a body like this anymore?”
“Are you kidding? That’s not what I meant.” Koutarou hurriedly denied it.
“I always want to touch you, Shuuji, I can’t help it.”
“Well then hurry up…”
At Shuuji’s invitation, Koutarou unhesitatingly buried his face in Shuuji’s chest.
He sucked on Shuuji’s petite nipples, rolled them around with the tip of his tongue.
Hearing Shuuji letting out faint breaths above him, Koutarou moved his tongue more.
Shuuji’s body was sensitive everywhere, and had always displayed an acute reaction to Koutarou’s caresses, but his chest was especially susceptible.
The way he moved his hips and let out those distressed sighs only inflamed Koutarou.
He hadn’t touched his own body, but things in his core were starting to heat up.
Even so, Koutarou wasn’t in a hurry.
He’d continue the caresses until Shuuji was entirely aflame.
Koutarou didn’t consider it true pleasure if he was the only one feeling good.
Still caressing Shuuji’s chest with his mouth, Koutarou gently brushed Shuuji’s hips with both hands.
This was another one of Shuuji’s weak points.
They’d embraced so many times that Koutarou knew Shuuji’s body better than anyone.
When Koutarou touched Shuuji’s shaft, it had already changed shape.
A sweet, impatient moan leaked from Shuuji’s mouth.
Koutarou laid his own shaft on top of Shuuji’s, and started to draw them both through his hand together.
Shuuji was only saying it out of embarrassment, and he rocked his hips back and forth.
“This way, we can feel it together.”
“Well then hurry up…”
Koutarou knew what Shuuji was demanding.
He hadn’t intended to get in a rush, but he wanted to feel Shuuji’s entire body.
“Hold on a little longer… You can’t?” Koutarou asked, and Shuuji scowled at him with teary eyes.
He was no match for that expression.
Koutarou lifted himself back up a bit to fulfill Shuuji’s wishes, stretching out his hand to the chest that was next to the bed and taking a condom and lotion from the drawer.
Then, putting the condom on himself with a practiced motion, he turned to Shuuji again.
Koutarou dribbled some lube on his hand and then put it between Shuuji’s legs.
It must have been cold, and Shuuji’s breath caught reflexively.
But he didn’t seem to be resisting, and Koutarou carefully pressed his finger deeper inside.
Shuuji tightened around Koutarou’s fingers.
The fact that he clenched up so tight meant that he still wasn’t ready to accept Koutarou.
Carefully moving his fingers inside, Koutarou brought his face in towards Shuuji’s shaft.
When he put Shuuji’s erection in his mouth, Shuuji puffed out a sweet sigh.
Shuuji’s breathing matched Koutarou’s use of his tongue, and they both gradually got hotter.
As he aggressively fondled Shuuji in front, Koutarou diligently loosened him in the back.
Even though it had been quite stiff at first, it eventually got soft and pulled in Koutarou’s fingers.
It was fine now.
Koutarou lifted his face and withdrew his fingers, gently taking hold of both of Shuuji’s legs behind the knees.
Then he moved his hips forward into that space.
Imagining what was about to happen, Shuuji’s body shivered.
But it was a shiver of anticipation, not of fear.
Knowing that, Koutarou didn’t pay it any attention, and pressed his own towering erection into Shuuji’s backside.
A lusty moan spilled from Shuuji’s lips as if it had been wrung out of him, carrying his pleasure with it.
Enveloped in his warmth, Koutarou puffed out a heated breath too, unable to endure it.
In that instant, although Koutarou was the one on top, he felt like he was the one being embraced by Shuuji.
It had to be because he was wrapped in Shuuji’s kindness.
“Shuuji, I’m gonna move?” Koutarou asked, and Shuuji nodded wordlessly.
Koutarou put his arms around Shuuji’s legs and thrust his hips firmly forward.
“Ah… Ugh… Haaa…”
A long, sweet moan flowed out of Shuuji, and it got Koutarou riled.
He thrust his hips upward with such fervor he almost lifted Shuuji up off the bed.
Pre-cum dribbled from Shuuji’s towering erection and dripped all the way down to where the two of them were joined.
Shuuji was already at his limit, and he wrapped his arms behind Koutarou’s neck and held on tight.
Koutarou reached his hand down to Shuuji’s shaft to hurry on his release.
“Aah–” Shuuji let out a loud moan, and released a splash into Koutarou’s hand.
At that moment, Koutarou climaxed too, inside Shuuji.
Savoring the exhilaration and release of ejaculation, Koutarou started to withdraw himself.
“Shuuji…?” Koutarou said in bewilderment.
Shuuji’s legs were wrapped around his, keeping him in place.
He must have been reluctant to part.
His hands around Koutarou’s neck were as tight as ever.
“Keep it up like that and I’m gonna do it again…” Koutarou said, and told Shuuji he thought they were going to end up in an awkward situation.
“I’m not satisfied yet,” Shuuji said, in a voice so small it seemed to disappear.
But it did reach Koutarou.
Shuuji wasn’t assertive in sexual matters by nature, and his libido wasn’t that strong either.
He’d rarely been the one to initiate things.
But since Koutarou had become the clone, he’d invited Koutarou to bed quite often.
Koutarou imagined it was because he was trying to confirm that Koutarou really was a flesh and blood human being.
If connecting their bodies could lessen Shuuji’s unease, Koutarou could only grant that wish.
Koutarou kissed him lightly to appease him, and then withdrew himself, removed the condom, and thrust back inside Shuuji without putting on a new one.
meaning they had a combined dining room/kitchen and then two additional rooms automated external defibrillator
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